EXPAND MY VIEW LORD Part 3

I am a take charge kind of person. When I see something that needs doing I do it! When I see something that isn’t right, I fix it! When things in my life aren’t changing as quickly as I would like I usually do something to speed things up. Now—I don’t sit around thinking of ways to do this, it just kind of happens naturally; out of the natural human in me. I am weak at times and I allow my flesh to take over. This comes mostly from years of experience in doing things my own way.

My ability to deal with life in a direct and controlled manner has gotten me pretty far in some respects. On the job I do very well, whatever I am working on I usually do well, even in the church, I can do fairly well those things I put my hands and mind to. This directness and take charge attitude is not so useful however, when it comes to relationships. Dealing with people does not come naturally to me. I do need to make a conscious effort when it comes to relationships.

Kind of a running joke I have with a friend of mine is “doing the work of the Lord would be so much easier if is not for all these people”. Funny? Not really. Without people there would be no need. But the fact of the matter is the most difficult areas of my life include other people. God intended us to be in relationship with people and we are to LOVE people. This is no easy thing. I often ask the Lord why this has to be so difficult.

A couple of days ago while reading Galatians I ran across the scripture about Abraham and Sarah. (Gal. 4:21-31) God made a promise to them that they would have many children, but because it wasn’t happening fast enough, Sarah took matters into her own hands. Sarah was trying to fulfill God’s plan; BIG mistake. Under Sarah’s direction Hagar (the slave girl) had Abraham’s child Ishmael, later Sarah finally found herself pregnant with Isaac. Sarah’s fulfillment of God’s plan caused problems and people were hurt by the result, but it did not stop God’s plan from coming to fruition.

Basically I do the same thing as Sarah, whenever I choose to take control instead of wait for God’s plan to unfold naturally. I pray asking the Lord to take care of an issue, but when it seems nothing is happening I begin to reason in my own mind about what should happen. I usually argue with myself about weather or not I should go through with my plan, but before long I have found a rational reason to fulfill it. I can talk myself into almost anything if I spend enough time looking at all the angles from my own perspective.

Once I have acted on my thoughts and feelings, it doesn’t take long for me to realize what has actually happened, but then I sit in remorse and try to make things right with God and with those who may have been effected by my decision. I realize I serve a God who is merciful, loving and kind and his plan is still with me. My actions always have consequences, but the blessings of God bring me out of my wretched life into the light again and hopefully I learn from my immaturity and perhaps grow a little.

My prayer when I've taken matters into my own hands is that my mistake would not be for nothing; that I will forgive myself just as the Lord already has and I will learn something valuable in the process. The Lord’s plan still stands for my life, just as they did for Abraham and Sara. I have to believe that.

WHY this need to control? Coming up next...